Build your own doll
What does it mean that I want to buy this Barbie book that features a stand-up paper doll (Barbie, of course) and around 20 paper dresses? It’s a build your own doll kind of book.
I cringe at myself sometimes. I honestly believe that I’m schizophrenic. Most of the time I just want to buy toys and play with them all afternoon. I have scale model furniture for dolls too.
Aaargh. I’ve just turned 31 and I don’t feel any different. When I was younger, around 12 or 14 years old, I thought adulthood was the serious phase and I wouldn’t have to feel worried that I didn’t do what to do most of the time (or 
that I wasn’t sure whether what I was doing was right or downright stupid). Now I’m 31, and heck I often feel as lost as I ever did. I still guess at normal; I still don’t know how to be subtle with my feelings; I’m still transparently…naive (or just plain stupid, as my husband sez when he’s pushed to the point of exasperation).
When am tired, I just want to read fantasy or sci-fi novels; talk to my Flip-Flap plant; or, well, now I want to play with paper dolls. Jeez. I gotta get my head checked, seriously.
Anyways, there’s still hope: one day I’ll wake up and I will be officially an adult — whatever that means. Often though, I think the world is run by adults acting like children, but instead hurling around toys when they get angry or upset, they hurl words, weapons and bombs.
Or they conduct their lives without care or thought to what happens to others around them, just as long as they get what they want when they want. Brats, in short.
Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo is the biggest brat the Philippines has ever seen.
—Just attended a big rally led by the Kilusang Magbubukid ng Pilipinas (KMP) and Anakpawis Party list. Thousands of farmers and rural poor from Central Luzon and Southern Tagalog marched for three straight days to get to the National Capital Region, and eventually to Manila with the intent of once more expressing their outrage against Macapagal-Arroyo and her brutality against the poor.
My favorite rallies are always the ones led by the farmers. The speakers at these protest directly come from the various grassroot peasant organizations, and their speeches, their stories, their imagery are so vivid, so alive that one will not be able to deny how horrible the living conditions are for majority of Filipinos who live in the provinces: the speakers are able to describe fully how life is like is there, the impact of militarization, land conversion, the utter absence of agricultural support services. The story of my country is one of exploitation and repression on one side; and struggle and revolution on the other.
Lupa, hindi bala. Hustisya, hindi Cha cha. Palayasin na si Gloria!
—-Have gotten so fat my pants don’t fit anymore, it’s shameful.
I’ve been home a month, and I’ve taken out all my clothes to determine which of them still fit, and which don’t anymore. To my frustration and self-disgust, I found that half have become too small for me.
What’s most annoying is the fact that I have to buy new clothes, just when I’ve become, well, less interested in clothes and ukay-ukay. It’s all become tiresome to me. After Hong Kong, after seeing all those boutiques and stores and the way Hong Kongites dress up, I feel that I’m better off not caring about clothes anymore.
But now I need new clothes. Effing hell. I need new pants, specifically. Gaaad.
Yeah, yeah - I suppose it would be easier to lose weight, but the fact is, I don’t want to lose weight. I like the way I look now; or rather, I like the way my body is because I feel better about it. I’m not such a lollipop anymore (my friend Nova once told me that my head looked way too big for my body because I was too thin, anorexic looking even).
Exercise, yes, exercise. I was thinking of taking up jogging again; and stretching exercises; but for reasons that I don’t want to divulge less there be a jinx, I can’t do any strenous exercises right now.
So it’s off to the ukay-ukay stores I go to look for jeans that fit. Gad.
—-
The 115th Assembly of the Interparliamentary Union in Geneva, Switzerland approved the resolution condemning political repression in the Philippines and the continuing incarceration of Rep. Crispin Beltran.
We have Ka Satur Ocampo and Teddy Casino to thank for pushing for this resolution. The following is the statement released by Ka Bel in the matter:
Anakpawis Rep.
Crispin Beltran extends his full gratitude to the international delegates and
leadership of the 115 th Assembly of the Interparliamentary Union
(IPU) for unanimously approving the resolution calling for his immediate
release. The IPU congress is being held in Geneva, Switzerland, and among the
delegates are Bayan Muna Reps. Satur Ocampo and Teddy Casino. Ocampo and Casino
facilitated moves to circulate the resolution calling on the Macacpagal-Arroyo
government to immediately release Beltran and the resolution garnered the
support of the IPU delegates.
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D(["mb","
\n
The IPU said it "Remains deeply concerned at the continuing detention of Mr. Beltran, which it fears is arbitrary; and calls once again on the authorities to release him forthwith or at the very least to transfer him to the custody of the House of Representatives."\n
\n
\n
It also said it was "puzzled at the notion of a continuing crime, which entails serious consequences such as arrest without warrant." The continuing crime doctrine is being invoked by the Philippine National Police and Department of Justice to justify the seven-month detention of Rep. Beltran.\n
\n
\n
"It feels most assuring and heartwarming to know that I have the support not only of my colleagues in the legislative houses here in the \nPhilippines, but also the support of colleagues and fellow progressive lawmakers in other countries. Pres. Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo should realize that the campaign of political repression she launched against progressive lawmakers such as myself and other leaders of the opposition do not go unnoticed. The more she stubbornly insists on keeping me under illegal detention and under fabricated charges, the greater the pressure will be on her to resign: the international community has given its attention to what is happening in the Philippines, and they more than understand the demand for her to step down," he said.\n
\n
\n
Beltran also thanked Reps. Ocampo and Casino for bringing the issue of his incarceration to the IPU.
\n\n
\n
",1]
);
//–>
The IPU said it
"Remains deeply concerned at the continuing detention of Mr. Beltran, which it
fears is arbitrary; and calls once again on the authorities to release him
forthwith or at the very least to transfer him to the custody of the House of
Representatives."
It also said it was
"puzzled at the notion of a continuing crime, which entails serious consequences
such as arrest without warrant." The continuing crime doctrine is being invoked
by the Philippine National Police and Department of Justice to justify the
seven-month detention of Rep. Beltran.
"It feels most
assuring and heartwarming to know that I have the support not only of my
colleagues in the legislative houses here in the Philippines, but also the
support of colleagues and fellow progressive lawmakers in other countries. Pres.
Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo should realize that the campaign of political repression
she launched against progressive lawmakers such as myself and other leaders of
the opposition do not go unnoticed. The more she stubbornly insists on keeping
me under illegal detention and under fabricated charges, the greater the
pressure will be on her to resign: the international community has given its
attention to what is happening in the Philippines, and they more than understand
the demand for her to step down," he said.
Beltran also
thanked Reps. Ocampo and Casino for bringing the issue of his incarceration to
the IPU.
<!–
D(["mb","The veteran labor leader turned activist legislator also said that for the meantime, he is seeking the full support of his colleagues in Congress and call on Speaker Jose de Venecia to allow his transfer from the Philippine Heart Center to the House of Representatives. He said that it was not so much his own physical limitations caused by age that is making his health deteriorate, \'It\'s actually being cooped up in the hospital under 24-7 monitoring of the CIDG and the Department of Justice.\n The tedium of being detained is what\'s making my health condition worse, that and hearing about the continued attacks of the Macapagal-Arroyo government on the political, civil and human rights of the Filipino people," he said.\n
\n
\n
Beltran said that he wants to be in Congress before session resumes in November. He said that it\'s clear that the govenrment does not having concrete to substantiate its charges of rebellion against him, and that it\'s only keeping him detained out of pique and refusal to admit that it was illegal to arrest him in the first place. \n
\n
\n
"The government has no case against me. I should be released at the soonest possible time; and I expect this government to stop fabricating more accusations and allegations against me and allow me to do my job as a legislator of the poor and marginalized sectors," he concluded.#\n
\n
\n\n",0]
);
//–>
The veteran labor leader turned activist
legislator also said that for the meantime, he is seeking the full support of
his colleagues in Congress and call on Speaker Jose de Venecia to allow his
transfer from the Philippine Heart Center to the House of Representatives. He
said that it was not so much his own physical limitations caused by age that is
making his health deteriorate, ‘It’s actually being cooped up in the hospital
under 24-7 monitoring of the CIDG and the Department of Justice. The tedium of being detained is what’s making my health condition worse,
that and hearing about the continued attacks of the Macapagal-Arroyo government
on the political, civil and human rights of the Filipino people," he said.
Beltran said that
he wants to be in Congress before session resumes in November. He said that it’s
clear that the govenrment does not having concrete to substantiate its charges
of rebellion against him, and that it’s only keeping him detained out of pique
and refusal to admit that it was illegal to arrest him in the first place.
"The government has
no case against me. I should be released at the soonest possible time; and I
expect this government to stop fabricating more accusations and allegations
against me and allow me to do my job as a legislator of the poor and
marginalized sectors," he concluded.
