Assessing Christmas 2005
Christmas Day 2005 was all about
1)Eating. The last two days have seen me and my husband (okay, so mostly it’s my husband) consuming everything edible in sight. Upon finding a Tupperware container of cold spaghetti within the recesses of the fridge, he unearths it and finishes off the contents - nevermind that just five minute before he’d just eaten a heavy breakfast of fried ham, rice and super chunky fruit salad.
"Naaawa a
ko sa spaghetti," is how he justifies the shocking display of katakawan.He sometimes remind of me of Garfield and his relationship with lasagna.
2) Baby-sitting. All afternoon today up to 8:30 pm, I took care of my 
baby niece Gabbie. The 11-month old rolly-polly bundle of unbearable cuteness refused to sleep a wink, and despite all our combined efforts to get her to take a nap– mine, my sister Majalla’s and my husband’s — she kept wriggling and gabbing and giggling all afternoon.
I sang to her, rocked her in her arms, threw her up in the air, played touch-toes-touch-fingers and Arab-in-a-tent with her , tickled her tummy, feet and armpits all in the vain attempt to exhaust her and get her to go beddy-bye.
Instead, by 4 pm, I was the one ready to keel over from exhaustion.
She simply refused to close her eyes. On her pudgy legs and dainty feet she insisted to roam around the house that already looked like it was hit by a Kansas tornado. She kept pointing at different objects — a candle, a picture frame, a glass paperweight, the toilet bowl cleaner, a bag of dogfood, a potato peel that escaped the trash can- and demanding that they be named for her in at least three languages: English, Filipino, and Goo-goospeak.
By the time my aunt, her Lola came back from watching a movie with my mom, I was ready to grab my own make-shift pacifier to stifle the cries that wanted to escape me.
Gabbie is one heck of a glorious baby, and she was never, not for a moment an annoyance, BUT SHE IS SIMPLY TOO MUCH FOR ME. It was like taking care of ten puppies at the same time but exactly: saliva, gurgling, baby yelps and all;
3) Rereading old horror fiction favorites with William Peter Blatty’s "The Exorcist" topping the list. It’s still the scariest but most meaningful horror novel for me. The horror isn’t so much because of all the descriptions of green, steaming vomit and church desecrations nor even how Regan MacNeil’s sweet 11-year old face was tarnsformed because of demonic possession.
What’s horrifying to me is how, well, faith is the real world is twisted and manipulated by the powers-that-be and used against the poor and exploited. I am always reminded of this whenever I read anything that even hints at faith and religion. Christmas is also a time for me to reflect on my beliefs regarding God and religion and faith and ideology, and most of the time I merely end up incensed and ranting against Catholicism and the ruling classes. I haven’t even gone to a single mass this Christmas — I simply cannot swallow any sermons that exhort me to forgive my enemies and those who seek to harm me (I’ve no personal enemies my self, but the enemies of the movement I am a part of are legion);
4) Trying to get my mom to relax. My mother is worse than six exposed electricity wires: she is always sending off sparks. She simply refuses to sit down! You use a plate and a fork to eat cake, and as soon as the last dab of icing is eaten, she swoops down, takes the plate and fork and washes them in the sink. No sooner do you drink the last drop from your glass of Coke, there she is refilling the glass and urging you to eat ice cream.
From all the urging, my husband is now at least 5 kilos heavier since the 24th.
I love my mom very much, and I’ve long accepted that no matter how old I get and no matter what responsibilities I take on in the world, to her I will always be a little girl;
5) Making a mental list of all the things I’m grateful for. Usually I do this (and on paper) on New Year’s Eve, but the list revealed itself to me earlier this year.
What are the things am most grateful for this year? In no particular order: new friends, newly-discovered skills, my husband coming home, my puppy Funny, learning new things - about art and literature, propaganda and political warfare, pasta recipes.
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postscript
Ang problema nga lang, pag labas ng pinto, maaalala mo na naman ang kalagayan ng lipunan- ang buhay ng ibang tao, ang kalagayan ng mayorya ng mga Pilipino na walang dahilan upang magdiwang (maliban na lang ang maliliit ngunit mahahalagang tagumpay ng pamilya sa trabaho, sa eskwela, sa pag-ibig…) dahil sa kahirapan at kawalan.
Sheesh. Hindi talaga kayang ipinid ang mga pinto at bintana. #
